Couple’s Devotions: Spiritual Preparation for Marriage

When my husband and I decided to get married, we knew it was one of the biggest decisions we would ever make. More than anything, we wanted our marriage to be strong and to last a lifetime, and we understood that the only way to do that was to build it on a solid foundation. For us, that meant putting God right at the center of our relationship from the very start, making Him a part of our union before we even walked down the aisle.

Planning a wedding can be incredibly stressful, and it's so easy to get lost in the details of picking flowers, tasting cakes, and making guest lists. We quickly realized we needed a way to escape the craziness and reconnect with each other and with why we were getting married in the first place. Setting aside a specific time for devotions each day became our quiet place, a moment to slow down and remind ourselves that our marriage was about much more than just the wedding day.

This daily habit wasn't just about checking a box or being 'good Christians'. We saw it as building a spiritual toolkit for our future life together. We knew that marriage would bring wonderful joys but also real challenges, and we wanted to be prepared. Reading God's word and praying together was our way of creating a shared foundation of faith that we could lean on when times got tough, ensuring we would turn to each other and to God, not away from each other.

If you're looking for a good place to start, there are many wonderful devotional books written specifically for engaged couples. You can find them online or in Christian bookstores, and they are great because they guide you through important topics you need to discuss before getting married. They often have sections on communication, handling money, forgiveness, and what it means to be a husband and a wife, which sparked so many important conversations for us.

You honestly don't need to buy anything special to have a meaningful devotional time. The Bible is the best guidebook for life and marriage that you could ever ask for. You can simply choose a book of the Bible to read through together, a chapter or a few verses at a time. The book of Proverbs is filled with practical wisdom for daily life, and Ephesians has beautiful passages about the meaning of a Christian marriage. Reading directly from the source is always powerful.

We felt a little overwhelmed by all the choices, so my husband and I decided to ask our pastor for a recommendation. He knew us as a couple and understood our hearts, so he was able to suggest a book that was perfect for us. Getting advice from a trusted spiritual leader, like a pastor or a mentor couple, can be a huge help because they can point you to resources you might not find on your own. We still have that book, and we sometimes look back at the notes we wrote in the margins.

The most important thing is to find something that you both genuinely connect with and will actually look forward to doing. It might take a little trial and error, and that's completely okay. Maybe you start with a book and find it isn't a good fit, so you switch to reading a chapter of the Bible instead. The goal is to connect with God and each other, so talk about what works for you as a couple and choose your path together.

To make this a real habit, you have to be intentional about finding a time that works for both of your schedules. Sit down together and look at your day to find a consistent spot. For my husband and me, the best time was right after we finished dinner, before we settled in for the evening. For you, it might be in the morning with your first cup of coffee, or if you're in a long-distance relationship, it could be over a video call before you say goodnight. The key is to schedule it in and protect that time.

Don't feel like you have to set aside a whole hour every day, because that can feel intimidating and make you want to quit before you even start. Our devotional time was usually just about fifteen minutes long, but it was focused and meaningful. A short, consistent time where you are both present and engaged is much more valuable than a long, distracted session. It's about the quality of the connection, not the quantity of minutes.

Life gets busy, and there will be days when you are too tired or something unexpected comes up and you have to miss your devotional time. Please, do not feel guilty about this! The goal is to build a positive, lifelong habit, not to achieve a perfect record. Just give yourselves grace and pick it right back up the next day. It's a journey, not a race, and consistency over the long run is what truly builds that strong foundation.

I will be the first to admit that praying out loud with another person, even the person you love most in the world, can feel a bit strange at first. It requires a lot of vulnerability to share your deepest thoughts and requests with God in front of your future spouse. But pushing through that initial awkwardness is so worth it, because it creates a level of trust and spiritual intimacy that is unlike anything else in your relationship.

A simple way to get comfortable with praying together is to just take turns. You don't both have to pray every single time. One day, he can lead the prayer, and the next day, you can. This takes a lot of the pressure off. Your prayers don't need to be long or sound super formal; they can be as simple as thanking God for your blessings and asking for His guidance as you prepare for your new life together.

Something my husband and I did that I highly recommend is starting a prayer journal. We bought a simple notebook and would write down our prayers and things we were thankful for. We prayed for our families, for help with wedding decisions, and for finding our first home together. Now, years later with our two children, it is such a joy to look back through that journal and see in writing how faithful God has been in answering our prayers.

Most importantly, use this time to pray for each other and for the future roles you will have in your marriage. I would pray for my fiancé to grow into a strong, loving, and wise husband who would lead our family well. He would pray for me to become a supportive, nurturing, and respectful wife. Praying for the person God was calling us to be for each other did so much to prepare our hearts for the covenant of marriage.

Building this habit of daily devotions while we were engaged was one of the smartest things we ever did. Because we had already made it a part of our daily rhythm, it felt completely natural to continue it after the wedding and honeymoon were over. It wasn't a new resolution we had to force into our married life; it was already a cherished part of our life together, which made the transition so much smoother.

Now that we're married with two kids, life throws all sorts of challenges at us, from work stress to sleepless nights with a sick child. Because we established that foundation early on, our immediate reaction when things get hard is to turn to God together. Prayer and seeking His wisdom is our first step, not our last resort after we've tried everything else. It unites us as a team against our problems instead of letting problems drive us apart.

That shared time with God before we were married built a unique spiritual bond between us that is truly the bedrock of our relationship. It's different from our emotional connection or our physical intimacy; it's a deeper strength that holds everything else together. It is our secret weapon, and I am so thankful that we gave ourselves this gift. I truly believe it's one of the main reasons we have such a happy and strong marriage today.