Parenting and Technology: Navigating the Digital Age

I remember when my son, my oldest, was little. My biggest worry was him falling off the swing set and scraping his knee. It seems so simple now. Today, with all three of my kids, I worry about things I can't even see, like what they might stumble upon on the internet. It's a whole new world of parenting, and it feels like the playground got a lot bigger and more complicated.

But I'm not one to think it's all bad. Honestly, technology has been a blessing in many ways. My kids can watch videos that teach them how to draw or learn about animals in faraway places. And with my parents living in another state, video calls are how my daughters really get to know their grandma and grandpa. It helps us stay close as a family, even when we are miles apart.

Still, you wouldn't let your child run wild in a new city without holding their hand, and the internet is no different. It’s a wonderful place, but it has its own dangers and rules. My husband and I believe it's our job to teach our kids how to be safe and smart online, just like we teach them to look both ways before crossing the street.

In our house, having clear and simple rules for technology has been a game-changer. It helps avoid a lot of arguments. We have 'tech-free' times every day, especially during dinner. That time is for us to talk and connect without any screens distracting us. We also have a rule that all screens get turned off an hour before bedtime to help everyone wind down and sleep better.

It's really not just about counting the minutes they are on their tablets. What they are actually doing online is much more important to me. I feel a lot better about my son spending an hour using an app to make his own simple video game than I do about him just mindlessly watching other people play games for an hour. I want them to use technology to be creative and learn things, not just to be entertained.

My husband and I make sure we are always a team when it comes to these rules. We talked about them together and agreed on them before we ever told the kids. When our children see that Mom and Dad both enforce the same rules, they understand that we're serious. It prevents them from trying to play one of us against the other. A united front is so important.

One of the best rules we ever made was creating a family charging station in our living room. Every night, all the phones and tablets go there to charge. This simple thing means there are no devices in the bedrooms. It helps me sleep better knowing they aren't tempted to stay up late scrolling, and it keeps their rooms as a place for rest and relaxation.

The most powerful tool I have is just talking to my kids. I make it a point to ask them about the new games they are playing or the funny videos their friends are sharing. It’s not about checking up on them, but about showing I'm interested in their world. When they know I'm listening, they are more likely to come to me if they see something that makes them feel confused or uncomfortable.

We've had many serious talks about how the internet is not like the real world. I’ve explained to all three of them that some people online pretend to be someone they are not. We have a very strict rule in our house: you never, ever share personal information. That means no last names, no pictures of our house, and never the name of their school. It's about protecting our family's privacy and safety.

I also use the parental control settings available on our devices and apps. Some people might think this is like spying, but I don't see it that way at all. For me, it's like putting up a safety fence in a yard for a toddler. It creates a safe space for them to explore and learn without accidentally wandering into a dangerous area. As they get older and show more responsibility, we can adjust those fences.

My husband and I work hard to make sure our family life isn't all about screens. We plan fun things to do together that don't involve any technology. We love taking our bikes out on the local trail on a Saturday morning, or having a big, messy family game night with board games. Even something as simple as cooking dinner together and letting the kids help becomes a great way to connect.

I think it's so important for kids to learn how to be bored sometimes. We don't always need to entertain them. When my daughters say, 'I'm bored,' I just tell them to go find something to do. It’s in those quiet moments, without a screen in front of them, that their imaginations really take off. They build forts out of blankets, put on plays for us, or draw amazing pictures. Boredom is where creativity is born.

Most importantly, we have to set the right example for our kids. They are always watching us. If I tell them to get off their tablets but then I spend the whole evening looking at my phone, my words don't mean anything. I make a conscious effort to put my phone down and be fully present when I'm with them. Our children learn more from what we do than from what we say.

Trying to be a good parent in this age of technology can feel like a huge challenge. There are new apps and trends popping up all the time, and it can feel impossible to keep up. But we shouldn't be afraid of it. Technology is a tool, and like any tool, it can be used for good or for bad.

Our job as parents hasn't really changed. We are here to guide our children and teach them values like responsibility, kindness, and self-control. We need to show them how to use these powerful digital tools wisely. The goal is to build a family that is so strong and connected that no amount of screen time can come between us.

At the end of the day, you have to trust your gut. You know your children better than anyone else. The rules and ideas that work for my family might not be the perfect fit for yours, and that is completely fine. The important thing is that you are thinking about these things, talking about them, and doing what you feel is best to protect and raise your kids in this digital world.